It can be more than a bit disconcerting to realize that after what for may have been the better part of your adult life you’ve changed or have begun to change. And while what I say next may seem counter-intuitive, walk with me, talk with me, join me in a small though experiment. I am going to suggest…Get a little lost first.
I’m not suggesting that you wallow in negative emotions. That would not only be miserable but counter-productive. Instead, give yourself permission to not know what to do next. To have no idea what your next move is going to be. That you may not know for a while. Or better yet, wander in a few different directions. Dabble, experiment, wander in the unknown for a bit. Get lost in the world at large and in the vast world within yourself. It’s fashionable for people to tell you that if you’re not sure what to do next just make some dramatic change and let the chips fall where they may. For some people this is absolutely true. But “look before you leap” is an age-old aphorism for a reason.
I’m gonna pause here and highlight that if you are in an unsafe situation in any way. Whether it is someone else or even yourself that is putting you and well-being in danger. You need to get to a place of safety first. This would definitely be a time to take action. But I digress. Making a big dramatic change isn’t for everyone. Sometimes it is more a matter of degrees.
Imagine for a moment a gyroscope toy. Ever wonder how if could dance along a string, stay upright and yet keep spinning. Put simply (very simply) the center, the axis, is surrounded by a frame and spinning rotor and (depending on its size) gimbals. As the ground moves beneath the “foot” of the axis all those spinning parts create a force called precession. In short (very short) this force counteracts the pull of gravity that would other topple the spinning toy. To sum up (very briefly) its in the small adjustments. A balance of push and pull that takes advantage of gravity to stay planted on the ground and standing upright.
This is a principle that can be applied to life. Like the gyroscope, if your feet are firmly planted, you may find that a minor adjustment in this area and a bit of tweak in another is what you need to find yourself upright and spinning in the right direction. No major or dramatic changes. No need to blow your life completely apart and rearrange the pieces. Rather, make a few slight changes and as my wife is so fond of advising “live with ‘em for a while”.
Or if you’re not sure what changes to make, you may find that wandering a bit rather choosing a new definitive path is the better way to your destination. Could a couple of small adjustments, a push here or pull there be more impactful than an enormous grand change. To put it another way maybe rather than taking a big gamble you just need make a few “gimbals”.
Now, the wonder of the wander isn’t always as wonderful as it sounds. For some of you, dear readers, it will sound down-right terrifying. In that case, I suggest you feel the fear and try anyway. A step from the well-worn path here or there isn’t likely to bring disaster. And it may well reveal a change of perspective you needed all along. Either way as wild a concept as it seem. Sometimes, when the next step is unclear or where to go now is uncertain, the best solution is actually to get out in the wild and go searching for the answers you answers your seek.
Thrive Laterally, Live Wyldy & Stay Quirktastsik for Lyfe